Archive for September, 2006


A Distasteful “Banquet”

Mr Ex- Schoolmate knew that I had not been to the movie for a long time. (coz nobody wanna date me mah) Last evening, he was pretty insistent about bringing me to the cinema. But there weren’t much choices, because LOT 1’s cinema is so fucking pathetic lor!

Between Miami Vice, John Tucker Must Die, The Haunted Apartment and The Banquet, I immediately ruled out "The Haunted Apartment"!! And I suggested "The Banquet", but Mr Ex-Schoolmate was a little apprehensive about it. He claimed that it is an "ARTISTIC" show and he is not so into that. I psycho him, telling him, it’s not going to be that artistic, this is more of an action movie, sword-fighting and what have you. Worst to the worst, I will explain to him, if he don’t get it.

Just shortly after the screening of the courtesy ad, reminding us to silent our hp. Some fucker hp rang and he shamelessly picked it up and started KPKB on his hp lor. NB, he was fucking buah zi dong lor! Mr Ex-Schoolmate was irritated and Shsss..! at him. I was wondering if I wanna let Mr Ex-Schoolmate know the REAL REASON for not visiting cinema that often… Err… As I am impulsive… There were at least 2 incidents happened in the past, that I stood up, turned around, glared and scolded vulgarities this type of irritants. (ya… in that exact sequence) Causing the people who came to the movie with me, lots of distress… ( *_*")

The_banquetSorry… A little carried away there… Anyway this show is all about SEX & VIOLENCE lor. Although it was beautifully filmed, but the content of the movie seriously lack substances lor! Every characters of that movie, was predictable. The plot was too simple and totally lack the feel of conspiracy. The most nan bei part was the ending. Zhang Ziyi, AKA the empress was murdered by a flying dagger coming from nowhere. Then hor… the movie just ended like that… also dunno who murder her, murder her for what fuck. CB, I hate to be hanged on the line like that!

I turned to Mr Ex-Schoolmate, "Huh?? Finish?? Who kill her lor?". He shrugged his shoulder, shook his head and let out a sigh. With a sheepish smirk, snuggling up to him, I told him," I promise you lor, I will never suggest this type of show anymore ok…."

That night, while I was still wondering to myself, why had I made such a lousy choice of show, Mr Ex-Schoolmate was already fast asleep…. he is probably cursing Feng Xiaogang (the director) in his dreams for wasting his money!

Sorry lah… Let’s watch "The Departed" for our next movie date. My treat lor this time… 😛The_departed


Ready.. on the mark.. get set.. wait!

I reached the hospital right on time for my doc’s appointment today. Waited for 10 minutes and then a nurse came over and whispered to me.

Nurse: Dr Hong ask if you wanna go downstair for lunch or a drink first?

Me (with an astonishing look): huh? why leh?

Nurse: Oh… the patient before you is still inside… (shake head a bit) … she …err… more problematic lah … you see.

Me: I am ok… (reaching out for more magazines)… I prefer to sit here & read.

Nurse nodded and went back behind the counter.

I wondered… if she had ever tell another patient of me being problematic, if ever that next person gotta wait…. (frown as I scratch my head)

25 minutes after my initial appointment time, I finally get to see my doc… aiyah… forgot to sneak a peep at the "problematic patient" that came out of her room. Very curious lor.

Doc: Hi Cindy, how are you feeling… hmm… you are looking good today. What have you been doing? Is it your lashes or the hair?

Me (blush): maybe…I don’t know… but I think I am feeling better.

Doc: oh… what have you been up to lately to make you feel this good?

Me: doc… Actually I m starting to see someone… (blush more.. act paiseh)

Doc (looking concern): Oh really, tell me all this person.

Then I went and told her lah… blah… blah… blah…

Doc: You know, I am glad that you finally decided to step out and accept someone… but I want you to be mindful. You know how you always sway from "all black to all white". I need you to remind yourself to be in control, to stay in the "grey area". (this is one of the characteristics of a BPD)

Me: doc… are you suggesting that I am not ready, becoz at times I doubt myself too. I fear myself for being overly emotional without realization of it. (pout)

Doc: You will never be ready when you don’t get started.

Huh??….So that’s means I ready or not??? Walking out of her room… more puzzled than I entered. WTF!!

Stayed in the office, worked late. Went home, cooked & ate dinner alone. MR EX-SCHOOLMATE sms to say that he is having dinner with his co-worker and will call me later. Take my time to soak in the long bath and did a DIY body scrub. Waited… 11.30pm, he called. I sounded a bit cold in the beginning, then "engine warm-up liao", I rattled non-stop & he just listened to all my nonsense. 1am, released him to bed and I continued writing this piece of shit.

KNN… Why am I still thinking if I am ready or not… No conclusion one lah!


Wedding, Bridal Gown & Work of the Neurotransmitters

Dsc01856I was the maid-of-honor for my best friend’s wedding, yesterday. After knowing her for more than 13 years, seeing her finally married off was …phew… a great relief… hahaha…

I was close to tears, seeing her walk down the aisle in her bridal gown with a very long veil trailing behind her; she was beaming with blissfulness and dazzaling the whole ballroom with her charms. Siao lor! It was not as if she is my daughter! Why I so emotional huh?Dsc01862 

Resize_1The whole day was… picture posing… tea ceremony… make-up… changing gowns… toasting… dinner… all recorded on film. Like making a reality show. But the only reality here is… wedding is a 1-day event, and marriage is a whole life of commitment. A 2-person bliss, celebrated by a few hundreds people. Very exhausting lah!

Wedding = declaration of love for eternity a time consuming, hectic and stressful event planning

Haiz… say so much… I want also don’t have lah!

Since I was a little girl, I would be fascinated by bridal gowns, always wishing that I would wear some, one day, never really quite bored who the fuck the groom would be nor what marriage is all about. I just wanna WEAR IT and take pictures lor! hehehe…. Thought of going into a bridal shop and ask if I could model the gowns for them for free!! LOL…Me & My Crazy ideas!


These days I felt I am intoxicated with Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Serotonin, Oxytocin and Vasopressin. I am just so different from my fucking self!

I had reminded myself to switch off the heater after shower, do the laundry more often (instead of piling my clothes until they spill out of my laundry basket), I close the fridge door with my hands instead of my legs, I sleep in absolute darkness (making my nite light redundant these days), I drink boiled water and I try to steer away from MSG. And….and… I couldn’t believe this myself!!!……I actually got up early this morning, to fix coffee and bread for MR EX-SCHOOLMATE, instead of catching the few remaining minutes, rolled up in my blanket!!

I can’t believe what all these neurotransmitter & hormones are doing to me! Aren’t they are making me a slave… (~_~)Dsc01857 

Are these fuzzy feelings good or bad?? Ask my shrink tomorrow… it’s been a while since my last appointment with her. My mood pendulum swings just a little (ya… I admit, I did cry a bit this couple of days… think might be stress or PMS), but still consider quite good liao, as I was out of mood stabilizers for a while already. Hoping no medications this time round. hehe…



I was having some issue with Mr Ex-Schoolmate this morning. I had this nagging feeling that, although he might do a lot for me, but somehow he has been having doubts that I might not be THE ONE!


How can we sense that who’s THE ONE?

Would we really know who is THE ONE THE REAL ONE?

Do I really give a fuck about determining who is THE ONE?? Yes / No

Makes me recalled reading somewhere that, THE ONE is someone who will spend your remaining days beside your death bed, not someone who makes your living days as delightful as you would have hoped for.

Thus I conclude that THE ONE can be anyone as long as you firmly believe that this is who, fate had brought into your life and you work with that person to lead him/her to be THE ONE.

So… is there really ‘THE ONE’ out there for me?

Perhaps I am not ready for ANYONE…

Flooded by negative thoughts. This is really bad for me…

Then I got this very meaningful quote in an email from a good friend, just a while ago. It says, "Just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to, doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have."

Then I thought… I might not be THE ONE, but why should I be so fucking bothered? As long as, he makes me smile… I will just sit back and enjoy being the temporary ONE instead.Dsc01803  *wink*


extremely made over…

Home alone with my Oki tonite… Mr Ex-Schoolmate had went to his company’s BBQ, one which has lots of booze, gambling and he said maybe mass orgy too… hahaha…

Super bored at home. Tuned in to Channel 5 X-treme Makeover…. Wow… ordinary people can look like superstar! Like became another person lor! Or maybe it is really a different person?

Hey, if I have the money, I could use some of those makeovers too …hehe… Top of my wish list would be liposuction! Yeah! I want to have a slimmer silhouette, NO… Actually I want a killer body! Then I want to do laser-resurfacing to get rid of my freckles, they used to look cute, but now I just looked flawed. And how about a taller nose, sharper face, higher cheekbones and deeper eyes for me?

I wanna look as desirable as Fiona Xie…wahahaha… she si bei hot lor… Opss I am drooling…

Aiya…for now, I can only dream… Coz I dun have money lah… and also, I am fucking scared of pain. The participants always come out of the surgery, looking as if they were ran over by some fucking trucks or for some, worst like crushed by a train!!

Haiz… I cannot dream anymore, must wake up… wake up… gotta finish doing a report. Yes… u heard me correctly. It’s close to 12 midnight and I still have to complete a report. Thanks to the CHEE BYE China people lah… KNN, last weekend burnt, this weekend burning too! When is this saga going to end?? NBPCB lah! Why can’t they trust us, or our company or Singapore government?? (Dun ask me what happen, I can’t talk about my work on my blog.)

Without X-treme Makeover, I can only hide under my blanket…Dsc01841 But I still look pretty right??


My Present

Everyone in the office seems to be catching on some viruses. With no exception, I kena too. The night before, I was having a headache which evolved into a sore throat, body-ache, cold and chills yesterday. I went to the clinic near my office, and came back with lozenges, paracetamol, flu tablets, cough syrup and anti-biotics… Wah… got so serious meh??

Dunno if it was my medicines or not, my gastric started acting up and the pain was so excruciating, I had to leave early from a BBQ. Mr Ex-Schoolmate came to drive me home. He commented I look bad  (~_~)

I was holding myself together throughout the journey home, suppressing the puke in my throat… Yuckz!! Fucking hate it. When I reached home, I made a record breaking dash to my toilet and threw up like a merlion! After I am done puking, I drop dead on my bed, while Mr Ex-Schoolmate was having a commotion my kitchen. Opss… forgot to mention… He gave me my first present…. A KETTLE & A FLASK!! Hahaha… His practicality definitely kills romance… Dsc01830_1  

When I told him that I am always drinking from the tap for the many years. He gave me a disgusted look and then he went and got me this kettle and the flask. He boiled the water and waited for it to cool, before transferring to the flask for me. So sweet hor!

Wondering…. if I would to finish the water in the flask, then how?? Would I be going back to drink straight from my tap?? You know, I am just so fucking lazy. Err… Mr Ex-Schoolmate, do you wanna be my water-boy? Hehe…

I just wanna say thanks so much, I appreciate all that you have done for me. For that, I shall extend your reservation of me to another 10 days more…… "if still no purchase order form", I will have put myself up on the display shelving again… hahaha…

PS: To all out there! Don’t fucking "suan" me again and say that I am dying to be his gal hor! Wo buah gian lor! Don’t believe me, you ask him yourself lor!


A letter of appeal

Dear Mr. AVA,

I was surfing your website just now and came across a column,” Pet Is for Life”. It contains so much wonderful information, teaching us how to be a responsible pet owner. I couldn’t have agreed more with you when you said that we, the pet owners can derive great satisfaction and joy from the relationships they have with our pets. Indeed, I love my dogs very dearly, they have given me so much more and the least I could do is to give them a home and love them back for life. You had preached this: “Pets should never be abandoned as an easy way out from the responsibilities of owning the pets.”  So here I am fighting for their rights to be loved.

Reading your website, made me so fucking sick!! What a hypocrite, you are!! After creating such a heart-warming website, your fucking officers are forcing me to give away the love of my life. I have two of the most wonderful dogs. They are not perfect, in fact, one of them is born crippled and the other is a stray dog, which I am sure that AVA is more than happy to euthanize her, if she was found roaming the street. But I love them all the same. In fact, I acknowledged that they are special in their own way, not many people would have accepted them, but I do, with all my heart and soul.

I run a pet business and keep my dogs in my shop where I spent bulk of my waking hours. I had tried to apply licenses for them but my applications were rejected. The reason for my unsuccessful applications is absolutely ridiculous! I was denied of the licenses because I am being deemed for having too many dogs! But what the fuck!! I am a pet shop operator, the rest of the dogs aren’t mine! They are either for sale or all here for grooming! Just because I am a pet shop operator, I can only groom and sell dogs, but not have a chance to love my two dogs and take care of them for life? This is totally absurd!

I have been given warnings to remove my two lovely dogs. Your officers had been insistent to seeing them vanished in a matter of days. So much for your “Pets should never be abandoned!” You are pushing me to “abandon” them, by giving me no reasonable alternatives. Can you fucking understand my misery for losing both of them at the same time? How am I supposed to ensure that I could find people who genuinely love them to adopt them in such short notice? You are more than cruel; I don’t know what the hell AVA is all about after facing this saga. Tearing me and my two beloved dogs apart, pronouncing an unjustifiable verdict, and denying my two dogs of love. Is that what AVA is capable of after all? You are nothing but a two-faced serpent!

I am appealing to you, to have mercy on me and my two dogs. Who could have looked beyond their disability and still provide them with more love than I? I just want to be able to live up to your key message, “A pet is a lifetime commitment.” I am not dead yet, don’t take them away from me. To you, they are just dogs, for me, they mean the world to me. Why can’t you just fucking understand?

Yours truly,

A person who is going through hell to keep his two beloved dogs


(PS: Bro, I burn midnite oil for this letter, how much you wanna pay me huh??)